Page 114

Bird Flu
Asian Bird Flu has struck Southern Florida.
Chicken Kick (Video, 16 sec)

Watch in the background: A chicken gets too close to the horse and gets kicked clear to the rim of the roof.


If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
Hurricane Season
A map of Florida during hurricane season.
Lovely Pair (Video, 39 sec)

British commercial for the Amstrad Videophone. A guy is talking on the videophone with his elderly father when his beautiful wife comes home.


A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

An old woman is upset at her husband's funeral. She complains to the mortician, "You have him in a brown suit and I wanted him in a blue suit"

The mortician says "We’ll take care of it, ma'am" and yells back, "Ed, switch the heads on two and four!"

Second Hand Smoke (Video, 42 sec)

In this advertisement a non-smoker in a restaurant is seated next to a smoker who takes great pleasure in his cigarette but is oblivious to the annoying second hand smoke that he's producing.


Last night, it was so cold, the flashers in New York were only describing themselves.
-- Johnny Carson